


For Me, With Me

by BaronVonChop



Category: Pacific Rim (2013)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-20
Updated: 2014-07-20
Packaged: 2018-02-09 15:17:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,250
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1987755
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BaronVonChop/pseuds/BaronVonChop
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Hermann hasn't seen Newt in the months since the closing of the Breach. They are both set to appear on a talkshow together, but Hermann isn't sure where the two of them stand.</p>
            </blockquote>





	For Me, With Me

Hermann Gottlieb spent the entirety of the cab ride to the television studio thinking about the Tumblr post. In the months since the the Breach was closed, Hermann had barely heard from Newt. Then, as the day of their talkshow interview drew near, Hermann had posted a link to to the announcement. That morning, Newt had “liked” the post, and reblogged it, adding, “Hey buddy, I can’t wait to see you! We’re gonna be on teevee!”

Hermann knew that he should have been happy about the prospect of seeing Newt again, but deep down he was peeved that this was their first interaction since the dissolution of PPDC. With the Breach closed and the kaiju threat eliminated, everyone had needed to figure out what to do with their lives.

For Hermann, that had meant accepting a lecture series at a prestigious German university.

Meanwhile, Newt had thrown himself into the postwar cleanup project. He served as an advisor to a multinational effort to reclaim the land poisoned by Kaiju Blue. Newt had also found time for a seemingly endless stream of interviews with magazines, radio shock jocks, and celebrity gossip columns.

Despite himself, Hermann had read, watched, and listened to them all. And in each one, Newt had made sure to mention Hermann: “Of course, I couldn’t have done it without Hermann Gottlieb, my partner-in-crime!” “I’d like to give a shout-out to my bro Hermann Gottlieb. Hermann, you da man!”

“Friend.” “Pal.” “Compadre.” Each mention sparked a brief thrill, but it was what Newt didn’t say that bothered him.

What had Hermann expected? Should he have dared to hope for more? Of course emotions had run high during the last few months of the Kaiju War, and everyone needed a way to release the tension. After Hermann and Newt drifted together with the kaiju brain, they both felt a sort of intimacy already, so a perhaps few awkward fumbles in the science lab were inevitable.

Well, a few fumbles and one truly memorable blowjob.

With the ongoing kaiju attacks on everyone’s minds, nobody was thinking in the long term. The topic of “them” never came up. But when the war ended, Newt seemed almost too quick to part ways with Hermann. The two of them had finally been getting along so well, and yet their paths parted the moment they were no longer connected by a shared goal.

The cab driver’s voice broke Hermann out of his reverie. “We’re here.”

Hermann stammered something as he grabbed his cane and fished out his wallet, but the cabbie just waved away the money. “It’s all taken care of. You’ll want that door right ahead.”

Once Hermann passed through the door, he found himself caught up in a whirlwind of preparations. An assistant with a binder told him the topics that he should avoid. It was safe to mention the sacrifices of the Jaeger pilots, but he should not bring up the Wall. Another assistant wanted to know if he needed anything: coffee, tea, sandwich, bagel. When Hermann asked for some water, the assistant disappeared and soon reappeared with an exquisitely chilled bottle.

With no fanfare, Hermann found himself being introduced to the host. She shook his hand with a light touch and told him how much she looked forward to interviewing him. Something about the way she said “we all owe you a great deal” convinced Hermann that she had no idea what he had really done. “Your friend Newt’s already in makeup. Just through there. And don’t let them do anything to your hair, it’s lovely just the way it is.”

Hermann found himself being hurried along, trying to remember the last time anyone had complimented his hair and wondering what was so lovely about it.

The makeup room was small but brightly lit, with several makeup artists gathered around Newt. Hermann made eye contact with Newt in the mirror. Newt stood with a familiar goofy grin, sending the makeup artists scattering. “Hermann! How ya been!”

Hermann felt his mouth pull up in a crooked smile. Hermann reached for Newt’s hand as Newt raised his arms for a hug. Hermann switched to a hug as Newt lowered his arms and reached for a handshake. In the end they compromised by shaking hands while Newt gave Hermann a half-hug with his other arm.

Newt beamed. “It’s great to see you!”

“It’s good to see you, too,” said Hermann, sensing the eyes on them. “This is all quite--”

“Amazing, huh?” Newt gestured to indicate the room and the studio.

Hermann opened his mouth and paused for a moment. “Yes, exactly.” He saw the makeup artists politely but pointedly preparing their makeup kits. “Perhaps we can catch up later. I should let these people get to work.”

Newt’s smile wavered for a second. “Yeah, of course. I’ll see you on set for the rehearsal.”

As Newt left, Hermann wondered if he had accidentally offended Newt. Hermann was nervous about the timetable and awkward around the polished staff, but he felt like he had been too curt with Newt.

Hermann sat in the chair, leaning his cane against the table. The host’s advice came back to him, but he found that he could no more prevent the team from adjusting his hair than he could turn down the array of colors and creams they dabbed on his face.

“Oh, your hair is so soft! What product do you use?”

Hermann was about to say “soap” when someone else said, “I love your sweater-vest. I wish I could pull off that look.”

Hermann was only half-listening now as he wondered how he would find an opportunity to talk to Newt alone.

What Newt had called the rehearsal turned out to be a chat with the host on the set before the cameras started rolling. The idea was to help Newt and Hermann get used to the set, but the audience was already in their seats and watching as the host asked Newt and Hermann questions about where they were from and what they were doing these days.

Hermann, sitting between Newt and the host, stammered out answers and tried not to sweat too much. The questions were mundane and easy to answer, but Hermann nevertheless tripped over his own tongue. More and more, the host directed her questions at Newt, until Hermann found himself sitting quietly as the host and Newt bantered back and forth across him.

When a production assistant waved at them from offstage, the host announced, “All right, let’s get ready for the real thing. Only, Hermann, would you mind switching seats with Newt when you come back?”

“Not at all,” Hermann said, more relieved than offended. He followed Newt to the green room backstage.

They sat down and Newt helped himself to some nuts from a bowl on the table. Here was Hermann’s chance to talk to Newt, but he couldn’t think of anything to say. He could feel butterflies in his stomach, and he began to seriously worry about being sick on camera.

“Are you all right, Hermann? You look kinda pale.”

“I’m fine.”

“This is your first time on TV, so it’s okay to be nervous. I mean, there’s going to be millions of people watching.”

Hermann dragged his hands across his knees to try to wipe off some of the sweat. “Yes, thank you, Newton, but that’s really not helping.”

Newt opened his mouth to say something, then closed it again. His eyebrows drew together and he leaned back. “Okay, sorry. I didn’t mean to make you more nervous. Don’t worry, they can edit out anything that they don’t want to use.”

“Like anything I say. Well, I’m sure you’ll give them lots of great material.” He had meant it as a joke, but he couldn’t keep the bitterness out of his voice. Why was it so easy for Newt? When he saw the look of confusion on Newt’s face, Hermann grabbed a handful of chips to focus on something else. When an assistant came to get them, Hermann and Newt were sitting quietly, eyes fixed on the bowls of snacks on the table.

Then they were back on set again, only now the lights seemed even brighter and Hermann could have sworn the crowd had grown larger. And, of course, the cameras were rolling.

The host greeted them as though they had not been chatting just a few minutes ago. “So, tell us, what are your fields of specialty?”

Mathematics seemed suddenly a lot lamer than xenobiology, and Hermann could tell from the way the host’s smile froze at his answer that she felt that way, too.

“And did you ever think that you would use your degrees to protect the world against giant monsters?”

Hermann gave the only response that occurred to him, which was, “No, of course not,” but Newt leaned back, propped up his right foot on his left knee, and somehow spun out an answer that had the audience laughing while the host flashed a dazzling smile.

When topic turned to their work during the war, Hermann tried to explain how he had created the model that could predict the next kaiju emergence. For a brief moment, he felt like he was finding his groove, and he could believe the audience was a class attending his lecture. Then the host cut him off, somewhat more sharply than he had expected, and Hermann knew that this part would never be aired. Newt gave him a sympathetic look and suddenly the host was all smiles again, and Newt told a hilarious story about how he discovered the purpose behind a mysterious kaiju organ.

There was a break built in for commercials, which gave Newt and Hermann a chance to get up and walk around. Hermann hurried to the green room, desperate for an escape. As he sank down onto one of the couches, he wondered what they would do if he refused to return when the break was over.

“This isn’t so bad, right?” Newt studied him with a worried look..

“Yes, maybe for you,” grumbled Hermann.

“I think you’re doing okay,” Newt offered, trying a smile.

Hermann blew out a breath. “I don’t know why I ever agreed to do this.”

“It’s a great opportunity! Who doesn’t want to be on TV?” Newt sat down next to Hermann and nudged his shoulder with his own.

Hermann scooted away as much as the couch allowed. “I don’t! I have no desire to be broadcast into the living rooms of millions of strangers.” He couldn’t meet Newt’s eyes. “The only reason I accepted the offer was because I--” He stopped, his cheeks burning. “But never mind, I was clearly mistaken.”

“About what?” Newt’s voice rose sharply.

Hermann turned and saw the concern on Newt’s face.

Hermann looked away again. “I just thought--Clearly, to you--It was only--” He spun on Newt with such ferocity that Newt actually jumped back. “Damn it, are you really going to make me say it?” Tears pricked his eyes.

“Hermann,” said Newt, and to Hermann’s surprise, Newt’s eyes had grown moist as well. Then before Hermann could make sense of it, Newt grabbed him by the lapels and pulled him in to a kiss.

Hermann’s eyes opened wide with surprise, then closed. He felt tears slide down his cheeks. He never wanted the kiss to end.

Someone knocked politely on the door. When Hermann and Newt disengaged, they saw an assistant watching them. “They’re ready for you on set,” the assistant said. Then he added, “I’ll see if I can get someone to run by and touch up your makeup.” As the assistant turned and hurried away, they saw him fumbling for a tissue to wipe away a tear. Hermann and Newt grinned foolishly at each other.

Hermann couldn’t seem to look away from that endearing, half-manic smile. He knew he was smiling himself. “Why didn’t you say anything? When I saw you in the makeup room, you seemed like… we were… just friends,” he somehow managed to say.

“I thought you were mad at me!” said Newt, looking hurt for a second, then grinning again.

“It was nerves! Nerves! That’s all it was!” Now they were laughing together. “But in the interviews, the ones you gave before, you always made it sound like we nothing more than friends.”

It was Newt’s turn to trip over his words. “Well, I didn’t know if I should… I mean, I didn’t think you’d want me to… to tell the whole world like that.”

As they returned to the set to wrap up the interview, the lights seemed almost friendly and the crowd faded into the background. Even the host’s smile looked more genuine as she asked, “So what was it like working together?”

Newt shrugged. “A nightmare, of course.” Hermann smiled and the crowd laughed.

The host turned her smile to Hermann. “Did you think so, too?”

“To put it simply, yes. I could tell you more about my first impression of him, but it would not be fit for television.” The host’s smile widened, and Hermann was sure that the audience laughed even more than they had for Newt.

“But you learned to work together?”

For a long moment, Newt and Hermann simply looked into each other’s eyes. Then Newt took Hermann’s hand and said, “Let me tell you about how my boyfriend and I saved the world.”

He did not let go of Hermann’s hand for the rest of the interview.


End file.
